


after it all

by pitoumugis



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Everybody Lives, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, forgiveness and self forgiveness, learning to cope, vr au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2019-12-16
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:14:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21812764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pitoumugis/pseuds/pitoumugis
Summary: After it all, Tsumugi reflects on love, what it meant, and how it was stolen from her.
Relationships: Shirogane Tsumugi/Tojo Kirumi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33





	after it all

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Penitence](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21746863) by [nnq](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nnq/pseuds/nnq). 



> Inspired by a friend's fic we were talking about in the oumota discord, I imagine it takes place in the same universe. It's linked, go check it out!! My daughter Hotaru is in there!!

Happily ever after, is not a thing Tsumugi knows. Not anymore, but maybe once upon a time, when she loved, truly and wholly, with her entire heart. When her love was real, and meaningful. But they took it, and twisted it, made it hollow. Made it fake.

She didn’t think it would be this way. She didn’t think they would all be left hurt. I suppose, she thinks, fiction really  _ does _ affect reality. Tsumugi had loved them; she had loved the characters, she had loved the story. She loved the bonds they made, the emotions they felt. She loved how they drew emotions from  _ her _ , how she related to them, how she was inspired by them.

She didn’t think that when she went under, they would change her. That they would steal that love from her.

And now, at the end, after it’s all over, what does she have left? She feels as hollow as her character was, and the others see it; she feels their gazes, their glares. The survivors are the most bitter. They all keep their distance. Maki has spit her vitriol times ten, and Himiko, passionate Himiko, had shouted her down.

Shuichi stared right through her.

The others... are varying. Miu is hostile, Korekiyo is despondent, Kaede has not spoken to her yet. She doesn’t know what it means, but she doesn’t think it’s good.

Gonta is the most forgiving, after hearing that she too had her memories altered, layered upon the ones she had, twisted her memories into something to suit the hollow character they wanted from her. He seems nervous, but forgiving. Hoshi as well, seems... not forgiving, but understanding. He’s a good man, but just as well has crimes on his hands; he cannot forgive her if he cannot forgive himself. Maybe someday.

And Kirumi... Kirumi is quiet. Neutral, perhaps. Or maybe she’s just keeping her feelings to herself. She was good at that.

So, they avoid her, she avoids them. It’s a win-win, right? This is where she finds herself, sitting alone in the yard, on a cold bench, staring up at the sky. She feels empty, she feels disgusting, she feels tired.

_ No matter how many bad things happen, the sky always stays the same _ .

Tsumugi hears a sob, and she’s surprised to realize it had come from her— Eyes welling up with tears, heart  _ aching _ , knowing that it’s over, hanging her head as she cries. There is nothing she can do from now on. They will all move on, they will heal, they will love again. But Tsumugi, Tsumugi will stay static, in cold sleep, idle while they all forget about her.

“Shirogane-san?”

Tsumugi’s head snaps up, face frozen as she meets the wide eyes of Kirumi Tojo; concern flashing across her face. “I...” She opens her mouth for some excuse, but nothing comes out and Kirumi beats her to it before she can think of anything.

By beating her to it, she means, Kirumi reaches out and offers a handkerchief, neatly folded. Tsumugi just stares at it.

“Take it,” she says, urging the handkerchief to Tsumugi, who dumbly lifts her hand to pick it up. Kirumi nods. “I’ll return with some tea,”

Before Tsumugi can even stop her, Kirumi is walking off, a purpose in her step. Even now, Kirumi never stops taking care of others. Their talents were ingrained into them, but Tsumugi wonders if it just came naturally to her.

Quietly, she looks down at the handkerchief in her hands. It’s plain, she notes. Maybe she got it from the hospital. Somewhere. Her fingers run over the soft fabric, a frown on her lips, when true to her word, Kirumi comes back with tea in hand. Tsumugi quickly dabs away her tears.

“Thank you,” she mumbles as Kirumi passes her the drink. It’s only a cheap paper cup, cheap tea, but Kirumi somehow makes it taste delicious, she notes as she takes a sip, warmth blooming in her chest and making her shiver as the cold air brushes her skin again, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

Kirumi remains at her side; standing, not sitting, at attention. Ready to serve. Tsumugi clears her throat, earning the maid’s attention. “You— You’re not, um.. Obligated, to take care of me,” she forces out.

“I’m a maid,” Kirumi argues. “It’s my duty.”

“You don’t have to serve me, Tojo-san,” Tsumugi returns it right back. “I know... what I did,”

She hears the click of a tongue. “Shirogane-san,” Kirumi calls her, waiting until she looks up to continue. “I only serve those I choose to serve.”

Tsumugi blinks owlishly as this processes. “But,” she starts. “But  _ why _ ?!” She’s surprised by the volume of her own voice, the force of the emotion behind it, as she grips the cup in her hands tight.

Kirumi, though, is not fazed in the slightest. “Shirogane-san, you too, were... manipulated, correct? We heard all about it,” she puts a hand to her chin. “I don’t think it’s fair to hate you.. For that.” Tsumugi makes a face at that. She’s not sure if she should agree or not.

She pauses for a moment, then continues. “But... to be perfectly honest,” she starts. “It might be because... I never saw that side of you. As far as I knew you, you were... quiet, and scared. It may have been an act, and a fake, but.. I never saw the side of you that they did.”

Kirumi smooths out her apron and then moves to sit beside Tsumugi, hands folded in her lap and ankles crossed, making her look delicate, but Tsumugi knows damn well the kind of strength in those limbs. “Team Danganronpa made those motives. Team Danganronpa put us there.” She says. “You didn’t really have a hand in that. You were just another character, a means to close the ending.”

“But... the others,” Tsumugi flounders helplessly.

“Surely, they’ll come around sometime,” she interjects, then turns to Tsumugi with a level gaze. “But, that will be a long time coming if you keep avoiding everyone, Shirogane-san.”

Tsumugi bristles. “They’re avoiding me,” she says flatly.

“It’s mutual,” Kirumi counters. “You’re not making an effort.”

That stalls Tsumugi, enough for Kirumi to take the empty cup from her hands and rise from the bench, throwing it into the trash. She returns, and stares her down. As if... waiting. Her eyes are stern, but patient.

Gritting her teeth, Tsumugi ducks her head once more, fingers curling into the fabric of her skirt. “How  _ can _ I? After what they did to me?” She spits out. “I can’t— I can’t even make an effort for  _ myself _ ; I’m— I’m  _ nothing—! _ ”

Kirumi lets her shout. Lets her vent. “Why?” She prompts.

Tsumugi’s lip quivers and she rises to her feet, stomping on the ground as her fists shake at her sides. “I  _ loved _ Danganronpa! I loved  _ fiction _ ; I loved characters, I loved  _ people _ !” She shouts. “It had meaning! It was real and it affected people! It gave hope and inspired people! It inspired  _ me _ ! And they turned it into— into something  _ cheap _ ! Something so, so hollow! For, what?! For this subpar ending?! They never cared about their story! This world they created! And they  _ never cared about me _ !” She stomps her foot one last time as tears squeeze through her lashes, eyes shut tight as she tries to keep them in, but they escape and drip to the ground regardless of her efforts.

Her hands, shaking, rise up to her chest and grip together. “I had  _ so much love _ ,” she whispers, her voice hoarse now. “And they took that away from me.”

There’s silence for a moment, and embarrassment crawls up Tsumugi’s throat, her face turning red as she realizes the words that had just spilled from her mouth, before a hand tucks under her chin and lifts her head up, meeting clear green eyes.

“You’re hurt. They hurt you,” Kirumi says softly. “And you’re allowed to hurt. We all are. But you too, will heal. You’ll love again, if you let yourself. Don’t give up before you even try. Now, lets go inside before you give yourself a cold.” Kirumi doesn’t give her any room for argument as she takes her by the arm and guides her into the warm building.

Tsumugi, for her part, feels lost. She feels frustrated. Insulted, maybe. But at the same time she feels... relieved. It feels as though she’s been drowning for ages, but for once, someone has extended a hand to her, telling her that  _ she _ has to reach out and take it. Or else, she’s just going to be drowning for ever.

Kirumi had extended her hand.

* * *

  
  


The next day, she’s rewarded by the soft look of surprise in Kirumi’s eyes as Tsumugi enters the commons with a novel in hand, where Miu is reclining on one of the couches, remote in hand as she flips through the channels with a bored look on her face.

Tsumugi smiles, she tries to. “Good morning, Tojo-san,” she swallows her cowardice, “Iruma-san,”

Miu makes a noise, like a groan. “Great, bitchtits finally stopped being a shut-in,” she scoffs, while Kirumi shoots her a look.

Well, not a great start, but... Tsumugi knew it would be rough sailing if she... wanted to try. She makes her way over and sits on the opposite couch— little comforts. Kirumi steps over from beside the kitchen entry. “Good morning, Shirogane-san. Did you rest well?” She asks, as she pours her a cup of tea.

“Well...” Tsumugi ponders this for a moment. “Better, I think. It’s better.”

Kirumi smiles softly. “I’ll bring you something to eat,”

“Why th’fuck are you still helping  _ her? _ ” Miu points bluntly at Tsumugi, no trace of shame on her face as she makes her stance clear.

“I am a maid, after all,” is Kirumi’s only reply as she makes her way back to the kitchen. As she does, she takes Miu’s cup as well.

“Hey!” Miu shouts. “I was still drinking that, you whore!”

Kirumi responds, by dumping the tea down the sink. “Is that so? The cup looks empty to me, Iruma-san,” she smiles, ever so politely, at the inventor, who gapes, as if she’d never expected Kirumi to act in such a petty way.

Tsumugi has to hide her snort with a hand as Miu launches into curses, and eventually turns her attention to the novel in her hands.

Tsumugi likes to read. She likes stories. She likes anime, and manga, and light novels. Lately, she’s been fond of the isekai genre; particularly the stories of otome villainesses. She likes to imagine herself as one of those girls, reincarnated into the body of the villainess. Alone, with only bad ends ahead of her.

Kirumi, she imagines.. Not as a maid, surprisingly, but a knight. Strong, firm, and noble. A heart of justice, to protect her people. It’s Kirumi, who opens the path for a good ending in her book.

That’s a nice idea, she thinks.

“Tojo-san,” she calls, earning a hum from the maid in the kitchen.

“Would you get me a pencil and some paper? I had a nice idea,”

To make an effort.

For herself.

**Author's Note:**

> i've never proofread anything in my life so don't @ me


End file.
